Put on Your Oxygen Mask:

Psychology in the Workplace

Luis Cárdenas - 26 May 2026

5 min read

When I came to the U.S. at the age of three, I did not speak a word of English. My parents enrolled me in Le Barron Elementary, and I had 2 teachers to help me adapt, one spoke English, and the other was bilingual. At that young age, I thought that everyone in the world spoke Spanish, but I quickly realized this was not the case. I wonder how being placed in this environment influenced my personality. I distinctly remember going off on my own while others played during recess. My favorite place was a corner far from everyone else. I would make up songs in my head and then sing them to myself as I ran all alone. I would turn away from the noise of the children laughing and, from behind the fence, stare into the peaceful street.

Fast forward to today, and I am teaching classes of over 30 graduate and undergraduate students and leading employees at companies such as Raytheon and Medtronic.

Who are you?

Many frameworks have been used to describe personality. For example, the DISC model, developed by Dr. Marston in 1928, is commonly used by companies to quickly and easily find your default and secondary personality type.

People whose dominant personality aligns with D or C are also called “Type A” personalities, and easygoing I or S people are “Type B.”

Knowing your personality type is useful because it helps you understand where you fit. For example, I am a D/C type and would be a strong fit for roles such as manufacturing manager, process engineer, or operations manager.

Conflict Management

These frameworks are useful for understanding yourself, but what about workplace conflict? For that, we use the Thomas-Kilmann instrument (TKI) developed in the early 1970s at UCLA’s School of Management. While the DISC model defines your default personality, TKI defines how you behave in moments of conflict. Even today, it is one of the most widely used tools for understanding conflict management.

I created this animal analogy to make it easier to remember. For an organization to succeed, we need more collaborators, the dog in the upper right. These are typically the most undervalued employees. Some companies limit or stop them from asking questions. Some will take advantage of the collaborator since they do much of the work. Eventually, the collaborator will catch on and stop working. Create a culture in your organization where the collaborator can thrive.

The organization should create a safe, collaborative environment that minimizes competitors, the wolf. In extreme cases, this behavior can become manipulative or narcissistic. We do not want these extreme cases. A strong, assertive personality is okay to a degree and helpful in some circumstances, for example, during times of war. If this is your default personality, you need to learn to cooperate more and let others take the lead when appropriate.

The sheep in this analogy is a compromiser. Many people fall into this category, and there is nothing wrong with it, except that if everyone were a sheep, then nothing would get done. I have seen, for example, a team that says “yes” to everything, and the problem does not get solved, or the project stalls. It is called “groupthink.” This is when a more assertive personality steps in to challenge the status quo and provide some direction.

The avoider, represented by the fox, is reclusive but highly intelligent. Encourage them to interact more. I used to be like this at the kindergarten playground, but I have since found my way into the world. If this is your default, get out of your comfort zone for a while, just enough to get things done. This person can have the most innovative, helpful ideas if only they would tell us.

Regardless of the personality type, the company needs to create a culture where people can speak up, ask questions, challenge, and feel safe doing so. To be a successful organization, encourage the avoider to speak up more and engage more. Identify the competitor and stop them from constantly competing and stabbing people in the back. There is no place for narcissism. Reward the compromiser for their hard work, and encourage them to take some risks and seek a leadership role as they gain experience. Don’t take advantage of the collaborator. They should be respected, valued, recognized, and encouraged to ask for help. Don’t let them do everything by themselves. Encourage them to teach and share their knowledge and to trust others to share in the work.

If we build a culture of trust and respect, in theory, all personalities should be able to contribute. Success will depend on involving everyone, every day.

What to do?

What if you are in a company that doesn’t have the type of culture described above? Despite your best efforts, you are not appreciated, silenced, exploited, or worse. What should you do when your boss is like the wolf described above? What if you are not allowed to progress and you feel stuck?

At some point, you may need to consider whether the environment is sustainable for your growth and well-being. Narcissism exists, and if you report to someone like that, there is not much you can do. Do not feel guilty. It is not your fault. If the company does not respect its employees, and there is no opportunity for growth, then you need to move on. In the end, the company will suffer for it and hopefully will realize that their behavior is not good for business. Once you are financially stable, have signed a contract or offer letter, give the two-week notice. In the meantime, try to avoid the toxic environment if you can, try to surround yourself with positive, well-intentioned people you can trust, until you are ready to take that next step in your career. Always have your resume ready and keep in touch with your network of friends for support. Life is not fair, and nobody said it would be easy, but you must take care of yourself before you can take care of others. Remember what they tell us on the plane: “Put your own oxygen mask on first before assisting others.” That is what you should do. You will not be able to fix a broken company or change a manipulative boss. Prioritize your own well-being and mental health. Make time for yourself, continue to find joy in the things you like, and don’t forget to put on your oxygen mask.

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